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How to Be a Man: (and Other Illusions)The cofounder of Guns N' Roses, Velvet Revolver, and Walking Papers shares what the hard knock rock life has taught him about how to be a good dude (in spite of it all). One wouldn't usually turn to a veteran of Guns N' Roses for advice on how to live, but Duff McKagan is not a typical rock musician. As chronicled in the New York Times bestseller It's So Easy (and other lies), Duff got sober at thirty, went back to school, got smart about money, fell
The cofounder of Guns N' Roses, Velvet Revolver, and Walking Papers shares what the hard-knock rock life has taught him about how to be a good dude (in spite of it all). One wouldn't usually turn to a veteran of Guns N' Roses for advice on how to live, but Duff McKagan is not a typical rock musician. As chronicled in the New York Times bestseller It's So Easy (and other lies), Duff got sober at thirty, went back to school, got smart about money, fell in love, became a father, and got his life back on track. Through trial and considerable error, Duff has learned to strike the balance between family and work, travel and contentment, financial aptitude and sacrifice. In How to Be a Man (and other illusions), Duff takes the reader into the life of an international rock musician and shares, with disarming candor and humor, the solid life lessons he's learned along the way to success and fulfillment in both his family life and his career. From hard-won advice on such basics as starting with a strong base and staying humble, to techniques on how to stave off depression and transform darker impulses into something productive, How to Be a Man is the ultimate guide to rocking life -- not as a dissolute train-wreck "rock star," but as a man destined for success and longevity.Binding Type: Paperback
Publisher: Da Capo Press
Published: 04/19/2016
ISBN: 9780306824494
Pages: 304
Weight: 0.70lbs
Size: 8.20h x 5.40w x 0.90d
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4.1 ★★★★★
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Product Reviews
★★★★★ 3
Dry mouth is miserable.
Size: 27 Count (Pack of 1)
The mouth lozenges for dry mouth were excellent at first, but I have dry mouth all day, and they started upsetting my stomach. I guess I was taking too many. Since I switched to the spry, I don't have a problem. I keep the a small bottle of the spray in my pocketbook, because I need it sporadically. It is probably different with each individual.
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Reviewed in the United States on April 11, 2026
★★★★★ 5
Powerful and eye-opening
Format: Paperback
A therapist on TikTok recommended this (thank you Kendyl!) and it is easily the most important book I've purchased in years. It pulls together the threads of otherwise "unimportant" early life events and helps to piece together a clearer picture of how those shape our thoughts, feelings, and behavior as adults. It's written for clinicians but would be helpful for a curious client who understands the basics of "parts" work and wants to use this as a resource in conjunction with therapy.
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Reviewed in the United States on February 20, 2024
★★★★★ 5
Amazing
Format: Paperback
It’s very academic—what I mean by that is that if you need to be well-educated in psychology to GRASP *everything*… I am not well-educated in psychology (I minored in it and love reading easier books on it), but I LOVE this book. This woman is brilliant
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Reviewed in the United States on March 24, 2024
★★★★★ 5
one of the best books I’ve read
Format: Kindle
This book is transformative in how I view everything. There are two categories: people who need to read this book and people who need to read it again.
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Reviewed in the United States on April 15, 2023
★★★★★ 5
Started w/ audiobook, now I'm ordering the print too
Format: Paperback
This book is GREAT!! The integration of theory she uses to support her claims is masterful. I began listening to the audiobook, because it was cheaper & I go through a ton of counseling & psych books. I am a grad student in social work, and I'm also a therapy client trying to heal myself.
I appreciate that this book targets "chronic shame" which as a central experience to a bunch of issues. The hundreds of books and articles I've researched seem like they were mostly ALL working back to this issue.
In a psychology culture that is big on cognitive and chemical solutions to mental health, the relational approach that she emphasizes is critical to the healing process. I appreciate the research she uses from object relations, affect regulation, interpersonal, etc. I purchased the hard copy because 1. I can't underline/highlight an audiobook and 2. I want a copy of the references of theorists and study's that she draws from, because they are pure gold.
All therapists need to understand the contents of this book! Unless you are perfectly fine offering band aid solutions. Clients and self-helpers beware. It's not triggering in terms of content, it is activating in the sense that she describes the felt experience of shame SO WELL. I could locate my own felt sense of shame which is, by default, unpleasant. Some stabilization and a decent therapeutic connection is probably necessary before cracking this book open. But that's why I love it. I needed to go deeper and get the core issues. And this book is like a map that guides you right to it.
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Reviewed in the United States on February 18, 2025